Those of you who read my recent blog on dealing with change “Over My Dead Body.” might have detected that I was dealing with something. No shocks dear reader, I was. I had been made redundant. Redundant after 16 years I might add. Before I go on, I see this a positive thing and I am learning many things from this life changing experience, can I share? You might want to get a cuppa.
The first thing was to allow myself to wallow. Wallow in the woe and misery of it all. Somehow I needed to just get it out of my system. Yes I sat in a chair and sobbed into my dogs ears for a bit, and then I may or may not have thrown a few things, BUT, It was important to put a time limit on all of this, after all the outcome was going to be the same, so why dwell for too long?
Next it was about not apportioning blame. There is nothing worse even if fault can be identified and placed; it is simply not constructive, so that was knocked on the head, quick sharp.
So have a bit of a wallow, tick. Do not blame, tick. Next, get selfish. I mean really selfish. If you are good at this, OK, I am not generally a selfish person, however I needed to allow this for myself, that way I was able to get some clarity on how to move forward, that is where the reinvention comes in.
I embarked on a strategy of personal advocacy with a view to use this in my new business and to foster and nurture new and existing contacts and relationships. It is most empowering, not to mention rewarding. People can be overwhelmingly generous and at a time when you feel rejected and hurt, it can really help to bolster ones resolve and enable a positive leap into the future. That future is about stepping into a new world with lots of options. Options are good, choice is good, and the more the can create, the easier it is to move on.
Part of this moving on has been developing my blog site (yes the one you’re reading), into more of a commercial site for my training services. Learning WordPress has been a joy, not to mention populating it, and buying a domain name was really quite exciting, talk about territorial. An Englishman’s homepage is his castle I tell you!
The Alarm Clock Moment
At this stage of the game, with the unflinching support of my wonderful partner, the love of my dog who’s ears are now dry, and the most brilliant support of my colleagues and friends, I genuinely feel different. I am able to behave in a more constructive way, feeling more than positive about the opportunities that are presenting themselves, and realising that even after 16 amazing years, there is life out there; you just have to get on with it. Life owes you nothing after all. You can make imposed changes work, however bad they may seem, so that you ultimately reinvent. Frank Herbert said, “Without change, something sleeps inside us and seldom awakes. The sleeper must awaken.” Well that alarm clock has certainly gone off in my world.
I sincerely hope, that should you be faced with something similar, that you too have a little ‘alarm clock’ moment too.